Fruitygoo Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 I've been through some rough rough times over the years and that isn't just from watching latics...I've had 3 bouts of depression - i'm also a reformed gambling addict after blitzing the best part of £30k in about 2 years. Speaking to people about all of this changed my life for the better and whilst there were a couple of relapses in terms of having to go back for further counselling, once i'd made the first step things were so much easier. Even on the relapses, I knew i could get better and rather than wait, i immediately got on the phone to my Dr. I haven't really had to many interactions with this with my closest friends but I have spoken to work colleagues and members of my teams that have told me they are experiencing issues. I agree with Beag - things will improve when people at all levels talk to their friends, their peers and their families..... If anyone is struggling with anything and has no-one to talk to - drop me an IM....I'm not mental expert but i'm a good listener 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bristolatic Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 8 minutes ago, singe said: Indeed BL. And still somone did a downvote (not you) You wonder what makes some folk tick at times, don't you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
singe Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 1 minute ago, Bristolatic said: You wonder what makes some folk tick at times, don't you? Let's hope it was accidental. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bristolatic Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 7 minutes ago, singe said: Let's hope it was accidental. Yes, indeed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beag_teeets Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 18 minutes ago, Fruitygoo said: I've been through some rough rough times over the years and that isn't just from watching latics...I've had 3 bouts of depression - i'm also a reformed gambling addict after blitzing the best part of £30k in about 2 years. Speaking to people about all of this changed my life for the better and whilst there were a couple of relapses in terms of having to go back for further counselling, once i'd made the first step things were so much easier. Even on the relapses, I knew i could get better and rather than wait, i immediately got on the phone to my Dr. I haven't really had to many interactions with this with my closest friends but I have spoken to work colleagues and members of my teams that have told me they are experiencing issues. I agree with Beag - things will improve when people at all levels talk to their friends, their peers and their families..... If anyone is struggling with anything and has no-one to talk to - drop me an IM....I'm not mental expert but i'm a good listener You fucking mental bastard!!! I've lost count of bouts, relapses and zombie periods. First would've been when I was about 7, the latest one lasted about 10 years, I functioned, excelled in some areas but my life was crumbling and came to a head on 16th December 2016 with the end of my marriage. It took that to remove my head from my arse and get help again. These last two years have been the worst of my life punctuated with some of the absolute best as small acts of kindness from friends, colleagues and strangers nearly broke me but helped with the on-going recovery. Fuuuuck, I didn't intend to come out about this today, especially not to you lot but sod it, if Gambly McGee can share then I too can share my depression, anxiety and a bit of PTSD creeping in like the cheeky wee scamp it is. I've been doing well recently, I saw my doctor last Thursday and discussed dropping down the dosage of my meds, less than 24 hours later things got pretty bad and certain options became viable solutions, took till Tuesday night to get back to what passes for an even keel these days but I got through those minutes and they eventually turned in to hours and then became days. The nervous energy and adrenaline expended this week has taken it out of me so I've taken next week off work to give me time and space to return to stability. Like Fruitygoo I'm not a bad listener, far from an expert but happy to help, it takes my mind off my shit for a bit. The NHS is also there, you don't get carted off to the loony bin straight away but your GP is probably the best place to start. Most likely they'll tell you how to engage with your local mental health services and prescribe you meds which initially make you feel worse but in time, once they've become established in your system start to help with the immediate crisis and help you to function and get through the stage until talking therapies, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) or whichever treatment the mental health specialists think is the most suitable for you needs. All of this takes time and is hard. No magic cure and you have to commit to recovery, some days it's a step forward, other days (weeks, months) it is 8 miles backwards but as a friend says, just keep swimming. Some days you need to lie on your back and float for a bit but just keep swimming. You've got to do it everyday, that's the hard bit. But it does get easier. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maddog Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 (edited) My 2p, for what it’s worth. I’m not going to go on too much about this, as I don’t want to sound condescending. Also, hearing what other people have gone through can be so valuable to people, so I’d rather that take front seat in this thread. Everyone is different, but some general advice: -Don’t be hard on yourself for struggling. It’s part of the complexity of the human condition. You’re far from alone. Mental Health problems are so very common. -Asking for help is not a weakness. It’s a difficult thing to do, and shows strength. -If you need professional help, that’s ok. Ask for it - that’s what the NHS is there for. Healthy Minds is the usual NHS first port-of-call. In some boroughs you can self-refer, or ask your GP to do it for you. -Use your natural support. Make the people around you are aware you’re struggling. Work out a plan of action if things get really bad. Tell them what you need from them. Some people won’t be helpful, but some will surprise you. Give people a chance to help - they can’t help if they don’t know what’s going on. -Medication isn’t for everyone, but don’t totally rule it out. Talk to your doctor about it. Take as prescribed, and if it doesn’t work, there’s other types you can try. -Keep structure to your life. Force yourself as much as possible to keep active. Exercise if you can. -Take time for yourself and be kind to yourself - but try not to let this turn into self isolation. -Know that you can change, things can change, you CAN cope, and things CAN get better. Edited September 28, 2018 by maddog 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beag_teeets Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 This is Brexit Britain love, we've had enough of 'experts'. All good advice, used most of that myself. First time I've been on meds, I put my trust in my doctor, she knows more about this than I do and I tried to do what she and the lady from Healthy Minds said. Meds helped in the short term which helped get me to the next step, as you say, might not work for everyone and it can take trial and error to get on the right drug and dose. Takes time to get enough in your system to start working so don't expect instant results, if they are recommended for you don't let male pride fuck you in the ass, even a drowning man will reach for a piece of straw. Accomplishing one thing a day helps, getting out of bed is enough some days, others you can manage a walk round a park and pick a loaf up on the way back so you eat that day. But most importantly of all, for fucks sake don't support Latics, you've got enough on your plate without that shower giving you false hope before letting in two late goals when they should've cruised that game. This relegation was all my fault too, I missed many games of the good spell last year when Doyle was banging them in, when I was able to get back to matches his goals dried up and he got injured. Then at the end of the season I was having a good spell, I thought "I'll take a relegation if it means I keep my sanity", last few years when I've been shit Latics have survived, the one year I can cope with a relegation they go and bloody do it. Sorry everyone. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rudemedic Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 It would be remiss for me to not point out the following resource. https://www.nice.org.uk/guidance/cg90/ifp/chapter/About-this-information Although I'm not as familiar with NICE guidance as I should be I'd imagine they will have a similar resource for other conditions. Incidentally one of things that helped me most when I was "depressed" was taking regular exercise. This was improved even more by attending a class run by the physiotherapy department at North Manchester. Help is out there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
disjointed Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 Good luck to those of you who have posted in the last couple of pages, there is nothing I can say on here that can help in any way. But the way you have articulated about your issues makes me think that you are dealing with it in a positive manner. I'm sure supporting Latics can be both a help and a hindrance, hope you get all the help you need. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
League one forever Posted September 29, 2018 Share Posted September 29, 2018 (edited) FWIW. I don’t know a lot, but I do know this. Everybody is doing their best with what they’ve got. Aniexty is focusing on what you don’t want to happen. Your body doesn’t know the difference between what you create in your head and what is happening in the now. An thus one feels anxious or panicky. Your body reacts to what your mind creates. Try your best to stay in the moment. It’s often quite an ok place. We’re all in good shape, when our heads can have a rest for a bit. Whatever floats your boat to empty your mind, even for 20 minutes a day- do it. Then we can get back to the important stuff. . WHEN WILL BAXTER START? Edited September 29, 2018 by League one forever 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
longtimeblue Posted September 30, 2018 Share Posted September 30, 2018 (edited) On 9/28/2018 at 2:30 PM, Fruitygoo said: I've been through some rough rough times over the years and that isn't just from watching latics...I've had 3 bouts of depression - i'm also a reformed gambling addict after blitzing the best part of £30k in about 2 years. Speaking to people about all of this changed my life for the better and whilst there were a couple of relapses in terms of having to go back for further counselling, once i'd made the first step things were so much easier. Even on the relapses, I knew i could get better and rather than wait, i immediately got on the phone to my Dr. I haven't really had to many interactions with this with my closest friends but I have spoken to work colleagues and members of my teams that have told me they are experiencing issues. I agree with Beag - things will improve when people at all levels talk to their friends, their peers and their families..... If anyone is struggling with anything and has no-one to talk to - drop me an IM....I'm not mental expert but i'm a good listener . Edited September 30, 2018 by longtimeblue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bunty Blue Posted October 1, 2018 Share Posted October 1, 2018 I struggled with a Generalised Anxiety Disorder and depression a few years ago and pills helped but realising I needed to try and change was key and talking to a psychologist whilst undertaking Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) changed my life. It continues to help me cope with everything else life throws up, including being diagnosed with Parkinson’s seven years ago - which is my case was linked to my anxiety disorder. Anyone and everyone can suffer mental health issues and when you are in the depths of it there seems no way out. It’s hard, very hard, but if you can just start talking to someone it really can help. Watching Latics has always given me a much needed respite and whilst I usually go on my own, I never feel alone when surrounded by fellow Tics. I love the genuine offers of suppport on here for those going through dark days and am happy to talk and listen as well. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt Posted October 1, 2018 Share Posted October 1, 2018 On 9/26/2018 at 9:54 AM, BP1960 said: True, as long as some posters think they can get away with it they will push the boundaries even further. I'm going to try and push back a little. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zorrro Posted October 2, 2018 Share Posted October 2, 2018 We're doing show and tell, are we? Bloody splendid. Valuable stuff. I've experienced/suffered/whatever-you-want-to-bloody-call-it depression, anxiety and a bit of PTSD at various stages of my adult life, but particularly the past four years. My marriage almost ended as quickly as it started; I was in a very bad, disengaged space, and my wife wrote me a letter(!) saying how worried she was that we'd only been married six months but we seemed to be drifting apart. It was the metaphorical kicks in the nads I needed, as it made me open up to her about how I was feeling, how the source of those feelings were not her fault, that I fucking hated my job (and indeed still do) and it was making me miserable (and still is). I sought professional help, getting meds from my GP, being referred for CBT and having some one-to-one time with one of the therapists (not a euphemism). Whilst I didn't necessarily gain any tangible improvements to my mental health, it did open my mind to the fact that help was available, and that openness and honesty was hugely important. About two years ago I was at arguably my lowest ebb. I'd been put through three disciplinary hearings by my then-manager, which triggered a bout of PTSD. Christ alive, it was fucking awful. Luckily, a colleague of mine took it upon herself to refer me to Occupational Health, who organised some sessions with a trauma counsellor. This probably had the most profound impact; by the end of my six-week stint with her, I felt great. So much calmer, I felt more able to not fall prey to my thoughts and feelings... although that subsequently subsided when I had another bad experience with another shit manager. Thankfully, I moved teams about six months ago and my current manager is ace; really supportive, allows me the time and space I need, encourages me to do what's right for me and to hell with what other people may or may not think. Just knowing that my immediate superior has my back is a huge weight off my mind. I can do more things so much better. I meditated daily for a year, but fell off the wagon just under 12 months ago when my gran passed away (that triggered a fairly lengthy period of depression). I know how much better I feel when I do it, but making the time for it is something I've fallen out of the habit of. I should pick it up again. No time like the present, eh? My eating habits could improve dramatically; again, I know I can do it, because from Jan-March this year I stuck to a vegan diet and felt terrific. Again, not a difficult change to make, but equally easy to revert back to convenient eating. I still play football and I've recently started doing yoga twice a week, so my exercise isn't too bad, although could definitely improve. I'm conscious that this has turned into a ramble so I'll stop there... Ladies, gentleman, young and old, your mental health is of the utmost importance. If you're ever in need of someone to talk to, please please please just do it. I suspect most of us think "oh but I don't want to burden other people with my problems"... bullshit. Create an environment in which you feel comfortable sharing and being shared with. I love you all, y'set o' bastards. Peace and love. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GlossopLatic Posted October 10, 2018 Share Posted October 10, 2018 (edited) Im going to bring this thread back to the top today as its world mental health day today. Think this thread is a reminder we could all do with being abit nicer to each other. On the original thread that got cut down I was one of those who ended biteing which I probably shouldn't but their was a reason for it. Their was a time about when I went through something very similar what Zorro went through having to deal with a shit boss is awful and you can end up taking that shit home and having sleepless nights and it was at a time when I was buying my first house too so it was a stressful time in my life I ended up on beata blockers for a while. I ended up leaving said job and moved on and while my worklife has had a few ups and downs since Im not getting as worked up as I used to by it. Its not just important to look after your own mental health but of that of those around you. My 2 closest friends went through divorces a couple of years ago which is never easy especially when there are children involved. On one sunday morning I recieved a text from friend Y saying friend X was thinking of ending it all. I picked up the phone and spoke to him he was at Brighton beach with this 3 year old daughter I had to remind him he was a good dad and he mattered to his daughter. While hes had a few low moments since and Ive had to pick him up a few times we havent had to have that kind of conversation since. Friend Y went through a divorce a miscarriage a divorve and redundancy in the space of 3 months. I dont want to make this about me but on Both occasions Both friends were very grateful for me for reaching out to them and just listening and one described me as like being like a punchbag (metophorically speaking) all I did was listen . Im not an expert on this subject Id imagine Rudemedic and Maddog as healthcare proffesionals no way more about this than me. But if you know a friend who you think is struggling take them for a quiet pint or invite them round for a brew and just listen it can do alot more than some people realise. Edited October 10, 2018 by GlossopLatic Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bobledgersheart Posted October 10, 2018 Share Posted October 10, 2018 Well said Glossop. I've not experienced what some on here have but do know someone who has and will readily admit I'm not a great listener. Irrespective of whether you're able to assist sufferers or not we could all be a bit nicer and tolerant to people who don't see the World exactly as we do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
singe Posted October 10, 2018 Share Posted October 10, 2018 Zorro has inspired me to write. About 5 years ago I had a demanding job in Central London, albeit with an excellent boss, but quite a few twats working for my team and in other departments I linked with. I took on some local community stuff, and was in effect burning the candle at both ends not sleeping well. I had suicidal thoughts leading up. More ways and options to do it, rather than actual planning it out thoroughly. As is prevalent in my industry, recruitment was a nightmare, and we really struggled for staff. I recruited someone, but fell to the pressure of hiring them a little too early for the procedures to get us out of the mire. Naturally, there were problems, with their hire and it all kicked off. Around the same time, I set up an overnight clean of our commercial kitchen, but the cleaners left all the gear/chemicals everything there, and the team cooked meals for a 100 round it. I was miles away. The twats were all taking photos and sharing, but not showing me. and it should have been shut, but the backstabbing was awful and a complain lodged against me for shouting back, when they person calling me was the shouting. So it all came to a head. I just collapsed and bawled my eyes out on the 3rd disciplinary and was packed in a £70 taxi journey home and sent to the docs. They were pretty good initially. I was off work for 6 months, on meds, but zoned out. They weren't expecting me back at work when i eventually returned and quickly was put in a disciplinary interview and told there was a compromise agreement 3 months money and an agreed reference, and agreed private treatment of another 3 weeks (I'd had a month or so). So naturally they tried for 6 months to claim the money back for the 3 weeks private treatment. I have to say it was Head Office and almost policy rather than my colleagues. No other support after that. I carried on, unmonitored of the meds, before my wife said you need to come off these. I don't think I was ready in hindsight, although the thoughts have not returned thankfully. I think I needs to look into CBT to help deal with the tougher elements. So I say if you are feeling it's very tough, at least get to the docs, there initial reaction was excellent. Seek help. That is why I reacted to the post anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laticsmarra Posted October 10, 2018 Share Posted October 10, 2018 A lot has been said about mental health in the media recently. Let's just remember that it is likely with 1 in 4 people suffering from mental health problems that several of our players may be suffering. Bear that in mind when making personal insults on here,that doesn't help and is unnecessary.Let's face it our players aren't on premiership wages and have relatively short term contracts making it a precarious profession for most of them.Add this to the stress of getting paid late,let's cut them a bit of slack on here and let's not make any stress they may be feeling worse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Blue Alb Posted October 10, 2018 Share Posted October 10, 2018 Don’t post a lot but very interesting and honest posts here. My colleague’s daughter has a Masters in clinical psychology and is at the cutting edge of mental health treatment. A new process called TMS (Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation) will hopefully revolutionise treatment in this area. My dad, another lifelong Latics fan, suffered a breakdown and had the rather brutal but effective ECT and it has restored him to about 85% capacity. The new TMS is absolutely unintrusive and painless and will hopefully be rolled out in the NHS soon and start improving lives for lots of sufferers. All the best everyone - increase the peace. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rudemedic Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 He's just announced his retirement. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave_Og Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 Best of luck to him. No doubt there will still be some who think Latics should be slaughtered for not signing him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leeslover Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 Aside from wishing him well, I'm absolutely dieing to know where his 3rd child was conceived Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bobledgersheart Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 2 minutes ago, leeslover said: Aside from wishing him well, I'm absolutely dieing to know where his 3rd child was conceived .............whilst reading a magazine ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leeslover Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 4 minutes ago, Bobledgersheart said: .............whilst reading a magazine ? Or dancing in New York (although probably not) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bristolatic Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 Good luck to the lad. I hope he finds success in whatever he chooses to do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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