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Today's Chron - Pitch Problems


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Just had a thought!

 

An angry local resident who’s a keen Gardner set on trying to make the club abandon its redevelopment plans and search for a foreign field?

:shock:

 

The pitch is certainly vulnerable with easy access during darkness while the demolition work takes place, and will not be as secure as it used to be when the hoardings are erected round the cleared site. It must be a concern that the pitch is not perfect and the Rugby play on it this week, followed by two friendlies before the Millwall game.

 

Perhaps turf patches will have to be used to cover the bald bits - it will then be as good bad as the Old Trafford pitch.

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It's getting like the Fast Show's Ted & Ralph this with the "problems in the lower field". I can see Alan and Shez stood on the edge of the upper tier of the main stand looking out over the pitch, Alan looking mournful, Shez looking like he would rather be anywhere else.

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It's getting like the Fast Show's Ted & Ralph this with the "problems in the lower field". I can see Alan and Shez stood on the edge of the upper tier of the main stand looking out over the pitch, Alan looking mournful, Shez looking like he would rather be anywhere else.

 

A few seasons ago, Ronnie Moore could have emerged from his "office" and contributed with the wise words, "today, I will be mostly drinking vodka mixed with weedkiller".

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It's getting like the Fast Show's Ted & Ralph this with the "problems in the lower field". I can see Alan and Shez stood on the edge of the upper tier of the main stand looking out over the pitch, Alan looking mournful, Shez looking like he would rather be anywhere else.

What odds on Alan deciding that a ritual sacrifice to the Pitch-Gods is the only solution?

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What odds on Alan deciding that a ritual sacrifice to the Pitch-Gods is the only solution?

 

I can't see this working as surely he has been doing this every full moon since time immemorial? If it hasn't worked so far it won't work now, unless the dark lord is really not pleased!

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I can't see this working as surely he has been doing this every full moon since time immemorial? If it hasn't worked so far it won't work now, unless the dark lord is really not pleased!

 

He obviously needs to up the offering . A new born from a flame haired Derker maid just isn't cutting the mustard.

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I think he needs to actually let the blood fall onto the pitch rather than drinking it fresh from the victim.

 

But if he doesn't drain the newborn then his life force isn't fully replenished! We don't want what happened last time to occur again, especially now that Strivens has closed down.

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But if he doesn't drain the newborn then his life force isn't fully replenished! We don't want what happened last time to occur again, especially now that Strivens has closed down.

Clearly we need the Bison to lead a campaign for an increase in Oldham’s birth rate. With our early lead in test tube science we should really have them rolling off the production in sufficient quantities for both demonic sacrifice and executive snacking. Maybe people could get a discounted season ticket or some Club Points for handing over their bundles of joy?

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Clearly we need the Bison to lead a campaign for an increase in Oldham’s birth rate. With our early lead in test tube science we should really have them rolling off the production in sufficient quantities for both demonic sacrifice and executive snacking. Maybe people could get a discounted season ticket or some Club Points for handing over their bundles of joy?

 

It would certainly cut down the menace of KNIFE CRIME if all first borns were pushed through the special door in BP under cover of darkness.

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The pitch is certainly vulnerable with easy access during darkness while the demolition work takes place, and will not be as secure as it used to be when the hoardings are erected round the cleared site.

 

Lol....if thieves can nicked shedloads of copper wiring (see Dec 2007) from under our noses, I'd suggest anyone could easily get into BP at any time.

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