joe_lead

The discount prices should be extended to at least October ! I'm waiting to see what's being served up this year before committing. My travel costs are significantly higher than ST price, I couldn't be bothered travelling down to BP at the backend of last season so didn't maximise its benefit. Saved a fortune in pies and petrol mind.

done both..what does either achieve?

 

"vote for crap#1...crap#2...crap#3...oddball#1...oddball#2...scummy party#1..."

 

great choices eh?

Just be thankful that only one of them can win!!

For what it's worth we had the 3rd best average away attendance (not away support) behind Leeds and Leicester. So it would appear that not only does the town of Oldham still have faith but we are considered worth watching by the rest of the country.

Ask yourself a few simple questions like:

1. Are my parents proud of what I have become?

2. Am I better than how others may see me?

3. What could I do to contribute to Society in a more positive way?

2. Have I got an unhealthy obsession with attention seeking?

Then change your behaviour accordingly.

Manchester United - Michael Clegg, Martin Buchan

Arsenal -

Chelsea -

Liverpool -

Aston Villa - Ian Olney

Tottenham Hotspur - Mark Hughes

Everton - Mike Milligan Neil Adams, Ian Snodin

Newcastle United - David Beharall

Blackburn Rovers -

West Ham United -

Middlesbrough - Mark Brennan

Southampton Nicky Banger Muzza

Leeds United - Too many to mention

Manchester City Rick Holden Steve Redmond, Neil Pointon, Earl Barrett, Paul Warhurst

Bolton Wanderers - Dean Holden

Coventry City - Brian Kilcline

Sheffield Wednesday - Roger Wilde

Wimbledon

Charlton Athletic

Leicester City -

Fulham -

Derby County -

Sunderland - Paul Beevers

Nottingham Forest - David Currie

Portsmouth -

Ipswich Town -

Birmingham City --

Queens Park Rangers -

Norwich City -

Crystal Palace -

Sheffield United - Simon Stainrod

Wigan Athletic - Andy Holden

West Bromwich Albion

Reading

Bradford City - Dux Sean McCarthy

Watford - Neil Redfearn, Rick Holden

Barnsley -

Wolverhampton Wanderers

Swindon Town -

Hull City - Frank Bunn, Richard Jobson, Peter Skipper

Stoke City - Allan Smart

Rules -

1. Untill we get stuck we must have bought them directly from the club

2. You can only add one player to give others a chance

Manchester United

Arsenal

Chelsea

Liverpool

Aston Villa

Tottenham Hotspur

Everton

Newcastle United

Blackburn Rovers

West Ham United

Middlesbrough

Southampton

Leeds United

Manchester City

Bolton Wanderers

Coventry City

Sheffield Wednesday

Wimbledon

Charlton Athletic

Leicester City

Fulham

Derby County

Sunderland

Nottingham Forest

Portsmouth

Ipswich Town

Birmingham City

Queens Park Rangers

Norwich City

Crystal Palace

Sheffield United - Simon Stainrod

Wigan Athletic

West Bromwich Albion

Reading

Bradford City

Watford

Barnsley

Wolverhampton Wanderers

Swindon Town

Hull City

Stoke City

No cheating

http://www.sporcle.com/games/premierleaguealltime.php

40/42

Am at the point now where my boys require steering in the right direction. Have a Celtic and Barcelona fan. Was wondering to what extremes people have gone to to help them make the right choice. The story below got me thinking:

I've been all over the place growing up, but i spent a decent chunk of my youth in Dundee. At the age of five, I went to a school in Menzieshill that was fifty percent Celtic fans, fifty percent Dundee United fans. Every day after school, me and the auld man would kick a ball about and play a one-on-one match. The green outside our flat was a huge slope, but Da would always let me shoot down the slope, and him up it. I would be Celtic and he would be another Scottish team at random (he could never be Rangers) and Celtic would dramatically come back from being 9-6 down to win 10-9 every game.

I made a new friend, Tom, that I thought was the dog's bollix. He had good trainers and Scalextric. He was a Dundee United fan. And all of a sudden, I was too.

That night, I came home, I ate my dinner and went out with my ball and my auld man. He asked me, as he always did, what team I wanted to be. His mouth dropped when I replied "I want to be Dundee United."

"Okay", he replied, "You go down the hill this time, shoot upwards, I'll be Celtic."

Celtic won that game 10-0. Each time my father scored, he blasted the ball as hard as he could down the hill and I had to sprint down to follow it and trudge back up the hill. I was in floods of tears. Dad asked me if i wanted to play again, and I nodded. He asked who I wanted to be, and I replied "Dundee United". My father said "Right, down the hill again son." Again, Celtic won 10-0.

At this stage i was uncontrollably weeping. He asked once more if I wanted to play again. I nodded, my whole body shaking with tears as I asked "But can I be Celtic?"

"Of course son, you stand up the hill, shoot down this time. I'll be Dundee United." For the third time in a row, Celtic won 10-0. I never looked back.

Well done to all involved this season. Have really enjoyed reading about the exploits and many a time during a game this season, when I thought I was at a point of despair, the flag has caught my eye and brought a sense of prospective to proceedings.

Pacquiao was on fire. Obvious he was going to go at Hatton from the start, when he came out heavilly sweating and ref had to hold him back. His strategy of big punch left hook right hook was so effective, he landed so many big punches Hatton had no answer. Can't wait for Pac v Mayweather, now that WILL be a contest.

Even though I was born quite young, like most people my age, I am still 43

There is going t be an exclusive announcement live on latics world next week during the Wallsall game

Is he going to eat his own weight in porcupine arseholes during the half time break

Is this happy bandwaggon still rolling along? Jade = Everything that is wrong with the media in todays society. Jade = Trash. Jade = sycophantic "after the event" peace makers that really get on my nerves.

 

She was a media whore not only before her mediadeath, but on her staged/sell out funeral and [eerie voice]beyond the grave too-oooooooo[/eerie voice].

 

:censored:. I can't stand it any more. And the media they are the real :censored:in' culprits of the show, what the hell? Where did journalism go so goddamn wrong? We got bankers taking home :censored:loads of cash on the back of failures, MP's expense-gate upon expense-gate, Labour seemingly not giving a monkeys about anything anymore, the collapse of the capitalist freakin' world, and there's just a few things that we really need to get to grips with, and the journo's continue to report on the front pages: "I wish I could've said goodbye to Jade" and "Jade made my life worth living for". And blah, blah, blah

 

GIVE ME A :censored:IN' BREAK MAN!

 

The flipside I suppose is that there is one better thing than a stupid, ignorant person. And that's a stupid, ignorant dead one that gives hope to the children.

 

I hope nobody is making any money on the back of this, apart from her kids, man.

 

Goddamn frickin' leeches - the lot of you. This is my view, so there you go.

 

*spit*

 

Fin.

Who's to blame - Media for publishing or the public for buying. As much as it pains me to think about it it looks like there's a market out there .. Ohh my fookin god.

This is what Parkinson has to say : http://entertainment.timesonline.co.uk/tol...icle6048656.ece

 

Jade Goody, the reality TV star who died last month of cervical cancer aged 27, represented “all that is paltry and wretched about Britain”, Sir Michael Parkinson has said.

 

He told Radio Times: "Jade Goody has her own place in the history of television and, while it’s significant, it’s nothing to be proud of. Her death is as sad as the death of any young person, but it’s not the passing of a martyr or a saint or, God help us, Princess Di.

 

“When we clear the media smoke screen from around her death, what we’re left with is a woman who came to represent all that’s paltry and wretched about Britain today.

 

“She was brought up on a sink estate, as a child came to know drugs and crime, was barely educated, ignorant and puerile. Then she was projected to celebrity by Big Brother and became a media chattel to be exploited till the day she died.”

As much as I admire Parky for his many attributes, I find this criticism hard to accept from someone who has made millions and accepted a Knighthood from putting Celebrities on the pedestals they crave. It is Celebritism that I find paltry and wretched about Britain.

I take Jade for what she was, uneducated, harmless and honest who wanted the best for her kids. There are certainly many more people/role models more deserving of the accolade, but we 'the public' don't demand such people - Parky is in a prime position to make a difference however he has chosen not too, he would rather polish the egos of Celebrity turds. Jade obviously wasn't a big enough turd for Parky to polish. If you chose to swim in the sewers you have to accept that not everyone eats a high fibre diet.

Art Brut - Slap Dash for no cash

BBC Radio 6 at the moment is reet grand and beats me moaning about another poor refereeing display.

the bovis brigade will be back

Isn't that what we all want?

I remember when I was a child, the first day of snow and how excited I got - I ran to the back door and screamed to my parents...........

"Come on you know the deal - let me in!"

A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's

doing a show in a small town. With his dummy

on his knee, he starts going through his usual dumb blonde

jokes when a blonde woman in the 4th row stands on her

chair and starts shouting:

"I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you

think you can stereotype women that way? What does the

color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human

being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being

respected at work and in the community and from reaching

our full potential as a person. Because you and your kind

continue to perpetuate discrimination against not only blondes,

but women in general...and all in the name of humor!"

The embarrassed ventriloquist begins to apologise, and the

blonde yells, "You stay out of this, mister! I'm talking to that little

sh~~ on your knee."

Not a bad business decision, when you consider how many season tickets were likely to be sold. Good on em and lets hope the Oldham public respond.

On Official site

In the past six months or so the young upstarts have been knocked for a loop by ageing master boxers like Bernard Hopkins, Sugar Shane Mosley and Juan Manuel Marquez. All three master fighters prevailed despite the critics picking them to lose due to their age.

Can Khan beat the trend?

A major difference from those other fights is the style of fighters that were tagged with embarrassing one-sided losses. There was hard-hitting Kelly Pavlik, whirlwind punching Antonio Margarito and punching machine Juan Diaz. However each one was beaten by boxing geniuses.

Barrera easily falls into that same vein.

In his fight against Marquez, if not for sheite refereeing, Barrera could have been the winner of that fight. But any fight that close can go either way. The decision by the judges to rule Marquez the winner was not such an injustice. Barrera gave Marquez the hardest fight he’s had since losing to Manny Pacquiao.

But one major difference is Khan is not a slugger. Sure he has the power to knock a guy senseless but overall he is still a prizefighter who relies on his legs, speed and height to overcome his opponent. Khan is a boxer. After losing in September he's been working out in California honing on his skills he's been sparring with Manny Pacquiao to prepare him for De La Hoya and trained by some geezer who you can rest assured has been changing things defensively that could be exploited by an expert boxer. If Khan wins it will be a win that goes down in British boxing history. Will he win? Likely not ,but here's hoping but either way it should be a tremendous fight.

A blind man makes his way to a bar stool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?

The bar falls deadly quiet. In a deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know 5 things:

1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.

2. The bouncer is a blonde biker girl.

3. I'm a 6 foot tall, 175 pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.

4. The woman sitting next to me is a blonde and a professional weightlifter

5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.

Now, think about it seriously. Do you still want to tell that joke?

The blind man shakes his head and mutters, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it 5 times."

How to tell if you're married too long.....

Three women: one engaged, one married and one a mistress, are chatting about their relationships and decided to amaze their men. That night all three will wear black leather bras, stiletto heels and a mask over their eyes.

After a few days they meet up for lunch.

The engaged woman: The other night when my boyfriend came over he found me with a black leather bodice, tall stilettos and a mask. He saw me and said, 'You are the woman of my life. I love you.' Then we made love all night long.

The mistress: Me too! The other night I met my lover at his office and I was wearing the leather bodice, heels, mask over my eyes and a raincoat. When I opened the raincoat he didn't say a word, but we had wild sex all night.

The married woman: When my husband came home I was wearing the leather bodice, black stockings, stilettos and a mask over my eyes. As soon as he came in the door and saw me he said,

Whats for dinner Batman?

Shez: Fancy a jar?

Hughsey: Kick Off's in an hour

Shez: I was wondering why there was so many of the players around

Warning: This thread contains implied swear words:

Little boy playing with his train , mum overhears him say

"all you bastirds gettin off, feck off

all you bastirds gettin on feckin hurry up "

mum sends him to his room for 2 hours until he learns to be nice to passengers .

When he starts to play again 2 hours later mum hears him say

"Those disembarking please mind the step and have a nice day

Those boarding please find a seat and enjoy your journey +

those upset at the 2 hour delay can blame the fat coont in the kitchen "

======================================================

Any excuse to trot this one out again...

A farmer buys twenty sheep and hopes to have lots of lambs in the spring, Unfortunately the sheep can't seem to get pregnant, so he phones the vet and explains the situation, The vet informs him that perhaps they should try artificial insemination. The farmer, thinking this means something entirely different, reluctantly agrees and asks how he will know if the sheep are pregnant. "Oh they lie in the grass and roll about," says the vet.

As soon as the farmer gets off the phone he rounds up the sheep in his van, takes them into the woods and rogers them senseless. Every day he checks to see if the sheep are lying and rolling in the grass but they are not - they simply gambol about. After a month of incessant pumping, the poor man can barely lift himself from his bed, so as sson as the alarm goes off that morning, he asks his wife to check and see if they are lying in the grass rolling around.

"No", she says looking through the curtains, "but they are all in the van and one of them is beeping the horn."

===============================================

A guy goes to the doctor and says, “I got this sex problem, doc”.

“Well”, says the quack, “Tell me about your average day”.

“Well, it all starts in the middle of the night. My wife always wakes me up about 3:00 am for a nookie and then again about 5 o’clock so we can spend a couple of hours making love before I go to work.”

“Oh I see”, said the doc.

“No, hang on”, said the man,”…you see, when I get on the train to work I meet this girl every day and we get a compartment to ourselves and have sex all the way there.”

“Oh….now I see”, said the quack.

“No you don’t”, said our hero. “When I get to work my secretary really fancies me and I have to give her one in the storeroom”. “Oh….now I see”, said the quack.

“No no no”, he said. “When I go to lunch I meet this dinner lady I’m very fond of and we nip out the back for a quickie”. “Now I understand”, said the patient doctor.

“No, hang on”, said the bloke. “When I get back to work in the afternoon my boss, a very demanding lady I might add, has to have me or she says she’ll give me the sack.”

“Ahh….”, said the doctor, “now I see..”

“No, there’s more”, said our man, “when I get home my wife is so pleased to see me she gives me a blow job before dinner and then we have sex after dinner.”

“What’s your problem?”, asked the doc.

“Well…”, said our hero, “it hurts when I w@nk.”

==================================================

Never claimed it was a good joke thread !!