Bristolatic

........ and Eardley shows time after time the value of an overlapping full back. I can remember Bob Ledger doing it in the sixties before it became fashionable.

Yours truly has been caught between PMs and this thread, so you should have all had a PM by now. Thursday it is. I've rung Mac and he wants to know if I'm wearing a flower so he'll recognise me.

I don't see us getting KK, it's gone on too long now. With the season so close, I reckon Shez already has his sights on someone else and, as usual, he'll quite rightly play his cards close to his chest.

I can't see Shez just having one left back, we'd struggle to cover any injury, so I reckon it could still be Boertien plus A N Other as long as Boertien proves himself. If he doesn't, our 'mystery' signing (is it Mr Wright?) had better be able to last a full season and I'm not sure he would. He's about Daz Sheridan's age isn't he?

He was another one who would run through a brick wall for the cause and had a shot on him like a rocket launcher. Never seemed to stay long anywhere, but he didn't half make an impact while he had the chance. Where did all these barnstorming 'centre forwards' go?

Top player in a top team. No prima donnas, just a great team of workaholics led by probably Latics' greatest unsung hero of all time. He was never going to set the world on fire and become a household name, but probably the first name on anyone's team sheet. I was close to tears when he went to Everton, despite the £1M we got for him. He was never quite the same when he came back, but a true legend. Thanks for everything you did for the club, Milly.

Now look D_S. You're trying to baffle us with science here. It's so simple. Draw a line across England somewhere South of Birmingham, it doesn't matter where 'cos everything below that line is THE SOUTH. Now draw a line all the way round the old Lancashire border (bugger this Greater Manchester lark) and that is THE NORTH. Everything east of that line is THE LAND THE WORLD FORGOT (some people call it Yorkshire). Everyrhing north of it is, as previously stated, JOHHNY FOREIGNER COUNTRY & SCOTLAND. And yes, you're quite correct, they dooz talk a bit funny loyke in tyhe Brizzol areal. You hear it all the toyme in Asdal. But we're teaching 'em how to speak proper, like us NORTHERNERS. Ta-ra. I'm off for me tea. Those down South think they're posh and call it dinner. Well, I had that at 1 oclock.

Oldhamers are Midlanders? How dare you? I pride myself on being a Northerner. Midlanders are those folk with a dead weird accent. You know, the one where they don't talk, they sing. If you don't know the words or the tune, you're buggered. Anything North of Lancashire is not the North, its either Johnny Foreigner country or Scotland. I suppose I've now upset everyone between Birmingham and Salford and those who live in Cumbria, and any other points East. Err, aren't we sort of, well, drifting away from the thread a bit? Just thought I'd mention it.

You sure know how to treat a girl.

If all you've got the present Mrs Sideburns for her birthday is a banner, made by someone else to boot, all I can say is it's a bloody good job all this started, or the poor lady would have had nowt. Come on D_S, Latics fans are more generous than that - well, they are in Brizzol.

Aye thang yow. Pure guess work based nothing more than the fact I was running out of countries. Good one D_S.

Harrumph. Legia Warsaw, or Sparta Prague. It's gettin' to me now.

Flash of inspiration - Liberty Stadium, Swansea?

Hmm, unless you choose funny way out places for a holiday, it looks like Belgium to me. Hows about FC Bruges? Or Antwerp?

OMG, work!! I knew there was summat I was meant to be doing. Oh aye, I'm working from home and I'm already there. Phew!! I'll pop in later to see how many more have seen the light and defected to Brizzol.

Just leave all the messy stuff to me lads. I've got a black belt in origami and doing very well in training for the 'ecky thump championships. If that fails, I'll be right behind you. 'ere, where's Bristol Blue gone? He started this. We'll have to have a word at our glorious inaugural meeting of BOAST

Well, err, ahem, it's just possible I might have addressed the good man incorrectly. Don't mean I like cider though, just 'cos I live in Brizzol. Anyroaduppards, the bit I live in is in South Gloucestershire, not Zummerzet.

On its way.

That should be 'don't LIKE cider'. I said I'd lost the plot - never read the script, by looks of things.

Oops, er, sorry, I missed it. Er, I think I'm sorry I missed it. We'll have a vote on whether we want to adopt it or try and get a proper one. (Bristolatic runs and hides in a corner wondering how he is going explain all this to his wife, who already thinks he's lost the plot.) And, Mr Maddog, I don't cider, so there, nyerrhh.

It ain't any of us, I don't think. Looks like we'll a full team soon, never mind 5-a-side. We demand our banner - NOW !! or we'll get angry. You won't like us when we're angry. We turn green and burst all our buttons.

Right lads, if oa exile is taking his ball home, altogether now: "Sing when you're winning You only sing when you're winning." Great banter, fellas - loved it. Who's up for a protest march with banners proclaimimg "We want our own banner"? Bristol Blue - I'll PM you soon with some details. Terrific to have you on board.

Welcome, friend. I've always told my workmates that the Oldham cultural revolution will happen one day. This is a brilliant site and everyone is treating the way it should be. No sign of eejits that inhabit other sites. Be great to see you next week if you can make it.

It's usually played on Latics World before live commentaries, so why not as the lads run out. How about Tina Turner's "Simply The Best" or "Hi Ho Silver Lining" when we score. Whatever we choose, get plenty of copies made, 'cos we're gonna wear 'em out in no time.

Now listen 'ere, D_S. You said this was easy. I've discounted Halifax Town, Torquay United, Accrington Stanley and Salisbury City, so how about a wild stab at Anderlecht. Or Sparta Rotterdam Or Rapid Vienna Or Dynamo Kiev Or .......... I give up - it's bed time.